Actions prove who someone is, words just prove who they want to be.

June 21, 2020 3 min read

Ben Franklin said, “Well done is better than well said.” I don’t know about you all but I have already admitted to wanting to try and do everything interesting that I hear or learn about. If you talk to any of my family and friends, they would tell you that at this point I should be a hemp farming, cardiothoracic surgeon/dermatologist who runs a home for foster children aging out of care. And truth be told that would probably be what just one person tells you. A few months ago, one of my friends said something that hurt my feelings. Actually, that’s not accurate, my feelings weren’t hurt, but rather I felt as though my reputation was being besmirched… To know me well is to know that I hold my reputation near and dear because I believe that your reputation is all that you have. I’m sure that will be the subject of another post one day but for now, let’s focus on what he said that caused me to reflect longer than usual.


Essentially, he said that if I could focus on any of these areas and use any of my gifts and skills, I would be a force to be reckoned with. Okay, if you knew this friend, I recounted this interaction far more eloquently than he said it. What he said was closer to get off your butt and do one of these amazing things you always talk about. I was like… “Clutch my pearls, whatever do you mean?” He said your fear of failure has held you back from being the person you are meant to be – financially, professionally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. I got all in my feelings and shut down. I abruptly ended the call. After giving myself 15 minutes to sulk, I stopped and asked myself what about his comment caused that visceral reaction. It has been my experience that I only react the way that I did during the conversation when something was said that made me uncomfortable. Breaking it down even further, my reaction is usually due to having to face an uncomfortable truth about myself that I had not been able to or willing to face up to that point.


After reflecting on what he said and determining why it made me uncomfortable, I decided to stop talking about it and just do it. I just mixed like a quote with the Nike slogan, but you get what I mean. This website is a culmination of that reflection and discomfort I felt. In 2017 my Bucket List had an item that said I would start and maintain my website for one year regardless of the level of success I achieved. Hearing my friend tell me to poop or get off the pot, I resolved to be the me that I talked about being. So I determined that from that point on, I would ensure that my actions matched my words. Being clear this does not mean that once I try something, I will continue to do that thing, if I determine it does not bring me joy or closer to the person to the person I am becoming. It took me a while to realize that stopping isn’t quitting or equated to failure, it just means that I am choosing to focus on actions that help me get closer to who I am becoming.


The final word… decide what three actions you will take today to get closer to achieving your vision and goals?

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